By Jonah Lehrer
“Jonah Lehrer has much to supply the world….The publication is fascinating on approximately each page….Good writers make writing glance effortless, yet what humans like Lehrer do isn't really effortless at all.” —David Brooks, The ny instances ebook Review
Science author Jonah Lehrer explores the mysterious topic of love.
Weaving jointly medical reviews from medical psychologists, longitudinal reports of future health and happiness, ancient money owed and literary depictions, child-rearing manuals, and the language of on-line relationship websites, Jonah Lehrer’s A publication approximately Love plumbs the main mysterious, so much formative, most crucial impulse governing our lives.
Love confuses and compels us—and it may well ruin and outline us. It has encouraged our best poetry, outlined our societies and our ideals, and governs our biology. From the way in which babies connect to their mom and dad, to the best way we fall in love with someone else, to the best way a few discover a love for God or their pets, to the best way we take into accout and mourn love after it ends, this e-book specializes in learn that makes an attempt, even in glancing methods, to accommodate the long term and the typical. the main harmful fantasy of affection is that it’s effortless, that we fall into the sensation after which the sensation looks after itself. whereas we will simply degree the dopamine that motives the preliminary emotions of “falling” in love, the partnerships and devotions that final a long time or longer stay a secret. This booklet is set that secret. Love, Lehrer argues, isn't really equipped exclusively on overwhelming ardour, yet, fascinatingly, on a suite of talents to be cultivated over a life-time.
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Extra info for A Book About Love
When asked about their child, their answers were far more detailed, entertaining, and emotive. The highly sensitive mother is “able to see things from B’s [the baby’s] point of view,” Ainsworth wrote. ”70 This doesn’t mean that these sensitive mothers were pushovers, always obeying the whims of their kids. Ainsworth was careful to point out that true sensitivity also included plenty of boundaries; the most effective parents knew when to push back. ”71 While Watson and his followers dismissed the “mawkish” love of parents as a dangerous influence, weakening the will of their kids, Ainsworth pointed out that even effective discipline requires warmth.
Consider your underwear. Do you feel it? Are you conscious of it? Of course not. The garments are rubbing against some of the most sensitive nerves of the body, but you’ve learned to tune those signals out. The cotton has become an invisible fabric, as imperceptible as the air. The most important implications of habituation have to do with pleasure. Although animals are programmed to seek out rewards, the law of habituation means that these rewards come with diminishing returns. That’s why the first bite of chocolate cake is better than the second, and the second is better than the third.
Once again, the results were a stark reminder that attachment has lasting consequences. Children with secure attachments to their parents generally showed much higher levels of “social competence,” better able to develop and maintain relationships with other kids at the camp. As a result, they spent 40 percent more time with their friends. ”84 As Egeland and Sroufe followed the children into adolescence, they uncovered a most unexpected finding: the connection between infant attachment and the behavior of the children was getting stronger.
A Book About Love by Jonah Lehrer